Friday, June 24, 2016

Condition of the Heart: Example 1

Example 1:
When one feels anger and frustration because the head of states is making decisions that are against one’s own life principles…

How should one react?
Option 1: Vent the frustration on Facebook, by calling him/her “names” and posting derogatory messages that will vilify the individual.  Find a photograph with an attached statement that may or may not relate to the picture and could also be a lie.  It may feel good for a few minutes but it won’t last.

Option 2: If, able to, research the background of the decision made.  The pros and cons of the decisions.  Research who participated in making the decisions.  Research possible statistics of similar decisions made in the past by prior head of states, either from one’s country or others.  Refrain from posting anything that will inflame in oneself or others the negative feeling toward the head of states, because it will only multiply anger and frustration in oneself and others without accomplishing anything productive.

Option 3: If research as mentioned in option 2 cannot be done, one will still refrain from spreading negativity and frustration.  Try to express one’s own point of view, in a way, that will make others think and be curious about why one may not approve of the decision made.

Option 4: Frustration and anger may push someone to write on Facebook what one believes should have been a better decision and why.  It should be done with respect towards all individuals concern, and statistics if available should be presented.  The argument will have supportive documents that may make other people think and review the decision made.

What is the best answer?
Option 2, 3 and 4 are acceptable answers depending on abilities and knowledge of the subject at end.  Option 1 is not a good option.  It does not stimulate goodness in others, it is spreading possible false statements. It is stimulating confrontation instead of cooperation.

                                                          _____________________


A condition of heart is an action that will stimulate and uplift our ability to love humanity and be a positive influence in helping each other to become the citizens of a stable, reliable, confident, supportive, caring, forgiving, intellectually stimulating, serving, giving, and kind cosmic world.

                                                          _____________________


The small video below is from Viktor Frankl, an Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist as well as a Holocaust survivor.
https://www.ted.com/talks/viktor_frankl_youth_in_search_of_meaning

He wrote a book worth reading, Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning.

Forgiveness is a very necessary but difficult thing to do.

I am responding to someone who has difficulties with the memory of her mother.

I am very sorry that you may not have had the loving, caring, and embracing mother that you should have had. Going to the funeral or not is not necessarily important.  What is most important is for you to get rid of the feeling inside your heart about your mother.  Not because it is important for your mother, but it is important for you.  A lot of people hurt others, voluntarily or involuntarily, and it is very hard for the person on the receiving end to go beyond that hurt but it is necessary for the well-being (physical and spiritual) of that individual and the well-being of everyone around as well and the children if you have any.

A person that my late husband had great regard for was Viktor Frankl.  He was an Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist as well as a Holocaust survivor.  Please research this individual and read his book.  You may also watch this short TED talk, the English is not really good but good enough to understand what he has to say.
https://www.ted.com/talks/viktor_frankl_youth_in_search_of_meaning

If you cannot go to your mother’s funeral because it will hurt you in a way that will endanger your stable self then don’t go, what is important is your own mental and emotional stability because if you are not stable then others will suffer too.  It is not selfish to take care of oneself, it is necessary for the sake of others.

Mother Theresa said to her sisters that they had to take care of themselves if they wanted to take care of others (they had to sleep and they had to eat).

I hope that what I am telling you will help.  Be the best that you can be regardless of the shortcoming of your mother and others.
Sincerely,
Anne-Marie